I'm not a fantastic baker

Last night I told you that I was considering about starting to blog in English (again) just so that You could have a summary of my day, just like my Finnish readers can. What you didn't know was that I decided to write for You, "Letters To My Sweetheart". What could be better?

I struggled with the right name, as usual, when suddenly this just popped into my mind. It made perfect sense. You are my most loyal and devoted reader by far (and quite possibly the only one), so why not just write to You? I'm not too talented with romance, but even I rank this one to the top of romantic things I've done in my life... though this may also be the only one. On the bright side, I've heard that men aren't really that big on romance anyway, so perhaps this does not qualify as a flaw in my case.

I'm, however, not a fantastic baker.

You know, I decided to try a new recipe today. You'd never guess what it was based on the pictures, which in this case are not worth a thousand words. I told you what it was supposed to be, but come on... I had a hard time presenting this... thing... to my guests.

Not too tasty-looking, right?

It's supposed to be some sort of an apple pie, but come to think of it, it'd be better off named "applemush", as that was largely what it resembled. At least the taste was great and it seems to only get better as it's spending some quality time in the depths of my fridge. My quests kindly told me that it was very good, but I'm not 100% convinced. You know how paranoid I am about my baking (and cooking).

I didn't really do much else today than try to make the place ready for the guests and bake stuff. Not the worst way to spend a Sunday, I'll give you that, but it would've been better to just get to spend it with You. This was now my second Sunday alone, since I returned from my trip to the States and in a way this was better. I also finally got some good sleep last night, instead of tossing and turning through it, so that's a plus. I try to think of small things to do to keep myself busy so that I wouldn't miss you all the damn time, but I just feel all wonky. In a way, I'm quite happy and content but at the same time there's just this really annoying feeling that I have, that something is just missing. A feeling of restlessness and... dare I say, despair. I've never felt quite so alone, oddly enough.

I'm sure I'll feel better over time again.

And hopefully it won't have to be that long of a time now.

I think I'd like to live in a house of tulips.

I bought the yellow ones on Friday (I think I told you) and the pink ones I just got as a present today. And I did manage to toss the old pink ones when I got back from visiting my parents. I didn't like doing it though. You know how I am with tossing away flowers. I feel as if I should hold a funeral. I need you here to toss away my dead flowers and tell me that my crappy pie tastes great.